“Empires, by Pride & Folly & Extravagance, ruin themselves like Individuals.”

Benjamin Franklin certainly understood history.

He had witnessed it unfold.

In fact, he predicted the unraveling of the British Empire.

Featuring some of his best satire and sharpest wit, Benjamin Franklin published an article in The Public Advertiser on September 11, 1773. In Rules By Which A Great Empire May Be Reduced To A Small One,”  Franklin explained the colonies’ grievances to a British audience, predicting the policies would lead to the downfall of the empire. 

With tongue firmly planted in cheek, Franklin satirically wrote the essay as an instruction manual on how to lose an empire.

Much of it sounds pretty familiar to the situation we face now – once again living under the largest government in history.

For instance, Franklin said one key to losing an empire is to bar the people or the states from defending against foreign enemies at their borders. Here’s how Franklin put it.

“If any Colony should at their own Charge erect a Fortress to secure their Port against the Fleets of a foreign Enemy, get your Governor to betray that Fortress into your Hands.”

And if that’s not enough, add a little gun control for good measure.

“If they should have lodged in such Fortress the very Arms they bought and used to aid you in your Conquests, seize them all, ’twill provoke like Ingratitude added to Robbery.”

Franklin’s sarcasm and wit, possibly unmatched by any writer of his time, hammered home the big point.

“One admirable Effect of these Operations will be, to discourage every other Colony from erecting such Defences, and so their and your Enemies may more easily invade them, to the great Disgrace of your Government, and of course the Furtherance of your Project.”

As you read through Franklin’s list of colonial grievances couched in satiric language, you find that they went far beyond “taxation without representation.” 

That’s not to say taxation wasn’t part of the formula. 

Franklin wrote that one pathway to losing an empire is to tax your subjects into oblivion and to “never regard the heavy burdens those remote People already undergo.”

You can make the arbitrary taxation more grievous “by public Declarations importing that your Power of taxing them has no Limits,” Franklin wrote. 

This will probably weaken every Idea of Security in their Property, and convince them that under such a Government they have nothing they can call their own; which can scarce fail of producing the happiest Consequences!

And if you want to make the taxes even more odious, “send from the Capital a Board of Officers to superintend the Collection, composed of the most indiscreet, ill-bred and insolent you can find.” 

Sounds pretty familiar, doesn’t it?!

But wait, there’s more!

As you tax the people, tell them you’re taking their money to “protect” them, but then make it the ultimate grift – lie to them and just waste it instead.

“If it [a tax] was originally appropriated for the Defence of the Provinces and the better Support of Government, and the Administration of Justice where it may be necessary, then apply none of it to that Defence.”

Then use that money to buy off political support.

As Franklin explained, “bestow it where it is not necessary,” to pay big salaries and pensions to government officials and their cronies.

On top of taxes, Franklin recommended piling on burdensome regulations. 

“Perplex their Commerce with infinite Regulations impossible to be remembered and observed; ordain Seizures of their Property for every Failure; take away the Trial of such Property by Jury, and give it to arbitrary Judges of your own appointing.”

Meanwhile, no matter how peacefully your Colonies have submitted to your Government, oversee it with a massive militarized force ready to put down any opposition with violence.

Franklin advised, “Suppose them always inclined to revolt, and treat them accordingly.” You do this by quartering troops among them “who by their Insolence may provoke the rising of Mobs, and by their Bullets and Bayonets suppress them.

“By this Means, like the Husband who uses his Wife ill from Suspicion, you may in Time convert your Suspicions into Realities.”

If you want to lose an empire, it’s always a good idea to treat people unfairly.

Take special Care the Provinces are never incorporated with the Mother Country, that they do not enjoy the same common Rights, the same Privileges in Commerce, and that they are governed by severer Laws, all of your enacting, without allowing them any Share in the Choice of the Legislators.

On top of all this, assert the power over the people “IN ALL CASES WHATSOEVER.” (a direct reference to the hated Declaratory Act)

This will “convince them, that they are at present under a Power something like that spoken of in the Scriptures, which can not only kill their Bodies, but damn their Souls to all Eternity, by compelling them, if it pleases, to worship the Devil.”

Of course, your subjects will complain when saddled with these burdens. The key is to Ignore every complaint and change nothing.

“To confirm these Impressions, and strike them deeper, whenever the Injured come to the Capital with Complaints of Mal-administration, Oppression, or Injustice, punish such Suitors with long Delay, enormous Expence, and a final Judgment in Favour of the Oppressor.

All of these, and more, should sound at least a little familiar. It’s a lot like what the federal government is doing to all of us today. 

Ultimately, all these are actions of a tyrant. 

For Benjamin Franklin, as he later proposed for the great seal of the United States, the people should never just sit idly by and take it:

“Rebellion to Tyrants is obedience to God.”

Michael Boldin